Wednesday, March 28, 2007
I wonder if anyone still reads this! Suddenly had the urge to blog today...
Received a phone call from foreign affairs today. n was totally stunned n unprepared. felt that i didn't handle it properly at all! I hope I haven't screwed it up before being shortlisted... =( damn.
The scholarship application has left me with lots of self doubts, questioning whether I'm good enough for one, whether I'll be happy with one, whether I'm doing the right thing... So many qns with no answers... :S
Sometimes, I feel like I have a split personality! I would like to believe that everything would turn out fine in the end, to believe in the goodness of the world, but I feel so cynical of it at the same time. But u're like that sometimes too right? The lovable child in you mixed with the cynical adult as well. how can such clashing personalities exist simultaneously?
Does destiny exist? but if it does, then does free will exist? Or is it an illusion of ours? If something is destinied to happen, then will what I do affect it or perhaps my actions are merely living out my destiny. Am i just creating excuses for my mistakes? I don't know anymore. I hate this indecisiveness in me. Show me a sign. Tell me what to do.
On a happier note, I went swimming today! took me mind off these troubling matters for a while! I miss swimming with you at HC pool... n I miss JC life on the whole...
This seems like such a sad post. Hope I can sort things out soon... :)
7:09 AM
iyiem took a shot at 7:09 AM
